Automatic Reply: “Thanks so much for being in touch - I am out of the office until June 28th. If this matter is time sensitive, please be in touch with (my trusted colleague), who will be able to help or reach me if urgent - Thanks.”
This message only works if you don’t!
It's summer – cue the sun, the sand, the beach, the lake…the vacation!
But for some people, the thought of vacation is very stressful. They worry about missed opportunities, work piling up, and no one else being capable of looking after stuff while they are gone.
These all may seem like legitimate reasons to forgo vacation, but don’t do it! Taking time away from work is important for our physical and mental health, and beneficial for overall performance and prevention of burnout.
When turning off your phone, unplugging and just relaxing is hard to practice
If you are having major difficulties detaching from work, it can be helpful to first examine the underlying causes.
• Write down all your reasons for not taking time off
• Examine what your sense of achievement or success looks like
• What is reinforcing these narratives? Where did the ideas/feelings come from?
Once you understand the drive to keep on working, it may be easier to balance the pros and cons of vacation time.
Did you grow up exposed to a work ethic that put loyalty to the institution before self care and prized workplace achievement as a determinant of overall personal success?
Are you like most people - defining yourself by what you do?
Consider your workplace atmosphere: Do you work in a place that actively promotes taking time off? Or it is an organization that talks about it, but does not practice it? Do you have team members who overtly or covertly vacation shame, putting on the martyr badge with comments like, “Lucky you can take time, I am so stressed with all that is on my plate,” “That’s great please relax for me too, I just can’t get away!” or, “Didn’t you just get back from holiday?”
Count external factors driving the behaviour
This must include our use of digital devices which make it impossible to leave the office behind or to escape the emotional triggers that are tied to media consumption, not to mention our constant exposure and interactions processing other people’s emotions.
Digital media platforms are designed to increase use and enhance the users’ emotions for a triggered response, good or bad. It is easy, therefore, to understand the drive to constantly check emails, Messenger, WhatsApp, TikTok, and Twitter. The ding of the device triggers a dopamine response, and everyone likes a good hit of dopamine.
Recognize that the days of vacationing like our parents and grandparents is over. Industries that shut down for summer’s two-week construction holiday are a thing of the past and having an office in your pocket, being reachable 24/7 is a reality we all face for better and worse.
31 million vacation days go unused in Canada each year
If you are a manager, help your staff to be prepared and knowledgeable of each other’s roles to help cover for each other – this holds true in case of an emergency too. It may be challenging in smaller organizations. Alternate solutions, such as a rotating assignment to check messages, may help.
Make sure to walk the talk and take your own vacation time. Try very hard to not contact employees while they are on vacation and let staff know you will not be contacting them unless absolutely necessary. (And even then, question if it really is!) Be mindful of your reactions to people’s vacation stories, careful not to respond with language that can cause shame or guilt.
We all need to seek ways to detach. Put alerts on silent and if needed, commit to only checking the phone at specific times. For some, the stress of not checking may lead to anxiety and stress that makes relaxation time moot – so if you need to look after certain tasks, make sure you are assigning a time frame that allows you to also enjoy some down time.
Enlist a colleague to be your back up. Know they’ve got your back and will be in touch if something needs your attention.
Structure long weekends. If it is truly impossible to detach from work for a full week, creating a three or four-day alternating work week can provide the down time you need.
Use the out of office message for both internal and external communications. If you are not comfortable saying you are on vacation, (which is a by-product of a culture that scorns time off – how can you be vacationing when I need something?!) then don’t. Make the message general and be sure to note when you are back and who they can contact in your place.
Try a digital detox. Plan your vacation in a location that actively discourages the use of digital devices.
Remember that staying home and not having to be in the office because of the pandemic is not a vacation.
Know that you are doing something that benefits everyone when you use your vacation time. A study conducted by the US based, Society for Human Resource Management, found that employees who take all or most of their vacation time are by far more productive, perform better, and are more satisfied with their work than their vacation-skipping colleagues.
Taking a “vacation” can mean different things for different people. For some, a luxurious destination is just the thing. Others find that camping in the woods or a planned staycation in the backyard enjoying family time does the trick. Whatever your bliss – do yourself a favor – and find it.
Happy holidays – and if you need me, please don’t! I will be lounging by a lake, enjoying a tall glass of iced tea.
Debbie Dankoff, MPNL, PPCC, CFRE has been working in the not-for-profit sector for over thirty years. The bulk of her career has been in major gift fundraising for higher education. Debbie is a certified Professional & Personal Coach, who uses her training when consulting for a variety of organizations in the charitable sector; her focus being on organizational development, donor stewardship and self-care.
